Sunday, July 10, 2011

Everything around me looked gray.

Hey yall! So.. for some odd reason lots of people in my real life and in my online life think that I am always happy. Well let me break your heart now before this lie gets any bigger. I am NOT always happy, actually most of the time I'm not.  Now don't get worried or think that this blog is going to be about me complaining about my current state of life and asking yall for donations. lol I personally think that is a bit pathetic.





I have learned that happiness is a choice. It's a mental and spiritual decision saying that you are not content with the current way you are feeling and you want better.

Ok before I get all Dalai Lama on that butt, let me back track and tell yallz the real deal!

Yesterday I woke up happy... i usually do wake up happy. Then throughout the day thoughts, worries, and stresses started to surround my mind. (probably because I chose to stay inside on a gorgeous Saturday) In a matter of minutes I was in a complete funk. It seemed like everything around me looked gray and i lost my sense of destiny and drive.

I'm not going to go into why I was upset because I want everyone to relate to my situation. I feel like when you get down to specifics you kind of lose the power to relate to a larger audience. Does that make sense?

Anyhoo!! I decided that I was not content with how i was currently feeling and I wanted better! So I took to facebook!! I reached out to my friends and asked them to send me titles of Motivational and Inspirational movies. In a matter of minutes I was reading about all these great movies. It was nice to see people that actually cared about me enough to help me out of my funk.



The first movie I watched spoke to me the most. "The Pursuit of Happyness"

If you were wondering, yes I did cry ... i cried a lot. I related to it on both ends. I felt what that child was feeling when I was a child. I feel what the father was feeling in my present situation.

Life is a fight, well for me it is. It's a fight to be better, get better, see better, love better, give better, feel better and live better. If you want these things you have to fight for it and most of the time you are fighting yourself. I think the hardest person to fight is yourself. Because you can trick and undermine you the best. Once you have beaten yourself I think the rest is a down hill battle. The world can't tell you "no you can't" if all you are hearing is "yes i can".

Once I was done watching the movie I felt motivated. Motivated to go after my dreams and start making bigger and better videos and blogs for y'all to enjoy. The funny thing about motivation is that it wares off, but you have to keep searching for it. In songs, in movies, in art, in quotes, in books and wherever else you can find it. Then hold on to it as long as possible and when it wears off, just get up and go look for it again. Motivation truly is the fuel that will get you to your goal.

Ok well I think I've said everything I wanted to say and a little bit more with this post, so I'm done! I will close this post with a nice quote though that motivated me this morning.




"If you are going through hell, keep going."~ Winston Churchill

3 comments:

  1. you're such a sweetheart and inspire people everyday I hope we helped ya. you made it much easier for me to come out and you have no idea how you changed my life Smiletone.

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  2. Nice post. I totally sympathize with everything you said. Keeping staying up even in those gray moments. That Winston Churchhill quote says it all.

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